Today, I had the privilege to interview one of Bollywood's upcoming young talent - Leong. If Leong was only a girl, I'd pee in my pants having to wait my turn to interview him. The Sun newspaper was just in front of me. I mean c'mon, I thought the only thing these guys were interested in were Beckham and that Spice Girl.
And so, it was my turn in interview Leong! You see, Celebs ought to be treated as intelligent people, up there with the big politicans... so i came prepared to test Leong's mantle with some of the world's toughest interview questions.
Spy(S): Hi Leong, wats up ma nigger?
Leong(L): (taken aback) Hi Spy.
S: Now let's start proper.... What have you been up to lately?
L: I have been recently involved with this company, Exam.com and bought up many shares in this up and coming company. Its based in the NTU EEE industry and even though i had lots of success in the past with such IPOs, this investment seems to have garnered a mixed response from the market. Once bullish and reliable, the stocks have indeed seem to show weird trends. Will i succeed? This leaves to be seen as i plan to stop investing on the 5th of May.
S: You could eat it after that, can you? I could do with some chicken stock. Yup. Yummy....
L: (blur look) urmm. ya. okay.
S: Next! Sex or rugby? Why?
L: Sex, cos im naughty in bed.
S: Hahahahha. you got me there. Always knew you to be into sports, but everybody has his/her secrets. So if you can be part of the Crazy Horse cabaret performance as the only male performing artiste, what kind of a role would you like to take up? And why?
L: I would be the pole for the pole dancers. Enough said.
S: Oh your good. good answer! I am sure the girls are getting hot now. Now a question i am sure the people of cartoonland are eager to know. In your honest opinion, do you think Kyle Broflovski and Stan Marsh from South Park are gay?
L: Nope, but i think eric cartman rules!! cheesy poofs!
S: (turns away to cough) -whispers to the camera- Ya rite. -rolls eyes-
S: (readjusting back into the chair) Another question that touches my heart deeply and I am sure yours too (it's been proven that Spy and Leong are sensitive new age guys)... If you can raise funds for research to find a cure for spinocerebral degeneration disease, what would you do, given you can only use a $5 bill, a black marker, a used vanguard sheet, and pair of running shoes?
L: I would use the 5 dollar bill to buy new vanguard sheets and use the black marker to draw out posters of my impending fund-raiser...."THE RACE OF LOVE", with my running shoes, i will jog ard the world and hopefully garner enough money to fund a research programme and of cos , give me millions to retire and lead a comfortable life after.
S: Your a good man. Now for a question close to your heart, list 3 important factors you think your ideal room mate must have, and why? Before you answer, i understand you have been going through a rough patch trying to find a room for the night in school, I would like to offer my sympathies and help of course!
L: (tears) yep... (3 factors namely are)shower me with tlc is cos its always nice to live in an enviroment where people care for one another, be willing to enjoy a fart-parade once in awhile cos i dun burp much, the air comes from the south, must not make me Roomless Leong. cos if im roomless, i wouldnt have a roomie anymore wont I?
S: Well, I can only hope that the somebody is reading this and realise the pain you are undergoing. Any last words for your fans?
L: Last word for my fans......thanks for gracing this blog and making this website a rousing success so far, we are currently on our target to (bring down) Xiaxue from her throne. Continue to be crappy and be happy my friends! Yes not forgetting, I love my wife so much! Love u sweets! And special thanks to _______ for ___ efforts to maintain the blog to keep spirits up during this broing exam period. Peace!
S: Thanks for being on The Interviw with me.
L: Pleasure's mine.
